Communicating One-on-One

You Talk Too Much: 4 Ways to Get Boring People to Stop Talking

We've all experienced it. You're at a networking meeting or a social event and there's that person who dominates the conversation and can't stop talking. You wish they would direct the conversation toward you but it's like a traffic jam of words. How do you get them to stop? Their verbal barrage is a red light signalling you to stop and listen. If only they would give you the green light by taking a breath. You patiently wait but your turn never comes. It's one thing to give a speech from the platform. But conversations should be a dialogue. A person who dominates the conversation soon becomes a bore.

What gives? Is it nervousness? Sometimes excessive talking can be a symptom of nervousness. For some people, verbal diarrhea stems from a lack of social skills. They just don't know how to stop and they don't pick up on non-verbal cues. As long as you maintain eye contact, they keep talking. To get them to stop, try these three techniques:

Ask a question of someone else. Bring someone into the conversation by asking their opinion of the topic that's being discussed as a monologue. This will stop the speaker because you have just disrupted the pattern of them speaking and you listening.

Use a bridge statement. If you're in a one-to-one situation, use a statement to turn the conversation back to you. "That's an interesting point and it reminds me of when I..." "Your business is interesting and I've experienced a similar situation..." Have these bridge statements handy so that you can use them effortlessly.

Be direct. Take control and ask, "Would you like to hear about what I do?" If they don't seem interested, use technique number four.

Disengage. When you've tried to replace a monologue with a dialogue, but nothing is working, end the conversation. "It's been nice chatting. I'm going to get a refill."  "My friend just walked in. It was nice to talk to you."

Press Release: Diane DiResta Invited to Share Powerful Communication Strategies to Reduce Anger and Conflict on Anger 911

For immediate release

DiResta Invited to Share Powerful Communication Strategies to Reduce Anger and Conflict

Diane DiResta, Founder of DiResta Communications, Inc, will be the guest on Anger 911 Radio to share "Powerful Communication Strategies to Reduce Anger and Conflict". Tune in on Wednesday, April 2nd at 9:00 a.m. EST. Visit and click on the purple mic. Anger 911 is syndicated on ClearChannel iHeart Radio - 50 million listeners! Read more ...

Is Your Difficult Audience in the Workplace?


When you think about difficult audiences, do you envision an audience in an auditorium with you speaking on the stage? Well, you don't have to be a formal public speaker to encounter a difficult audience. Your audience includes your co-workers, employees, management and vendors. When you're dealing with so many different personalities it's inevitable that there will be conflict. Here's where trained  public speakers have an advantage - the skills that are used to handle a difficult audience also apply when you're communicating one-on-one.

But what if you can prevent conflicts in the workplace? That's even better. Nobody has a 100% conflict-free life, but many conflicts can be averted when you understand yourself and others.

The unexamined life isn't worth living." -Socrates

The first step in managing a difficult person or situation is to understand how you're wired. What is your natural behavioral style? This is the way you communicate easily without much conscious effort. It's like being right handed. You don't think about it. When you meet a person or audience who has the same behavioral style as you, communication happens more easily.

But what happens when you encounter people who are your opposite? This is when an audience may be perceived as difficult. It would be great to have a tool that would help you recognize different behavioral styles so you know how to communicate effectively.

The DiSC Behavioral Profile can help you do that quickly and simply. The DiSC Behavioral Profile identifies your natural communication style, shows you how to recognize different styles, and gives you the tools for managing those differences.

In other words, you'll learn to speak their language and have greater influence, better communication, more understanding, and less stress.

Most often, conflicts happen because of differences in style; you're talking apples, they're talking oranges.

This can happen when you're giving a presentation to a group. For example, too often, technical people give too much detail to senior management. Or, a sales presentation lacks the level of data and evidence preferred by a scientific audience.

By knowing how others are wired, you can predict the commonalities you'll share, you'll be able to predict the conflicts that may arise, and you'll have a strategy to compromise.

Here's what one client had to say about DiSC:

Wow... Just signed on to take the DISC program with Diane and she helped me learn how to communicate with style!! Diane was simply amazing and her suggestions were 'spot on'. No one should miss this opportunity!"

-A. Weidberg

Don't know which style you are? Want to know more about DiSC? Contact us and ask for a free sample report.